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Lupus thoughts and Ramblings June 25th

Hey there. I hope you are staying safe and sane in this crazy world. It's a lot to stomach for anyone. I can't go crazy. I already am! Serious question? When do you tell your family that their joking around has become hurtful? It's to the point where I feel like I am in high school again, trying to compete for their love and attention. I am 45 yrs old and feel like I am treated like a child at times. I am told that I am too sensitive and that I take things out of context, that I should just take it, and know they are playing. Every night it's a roast the hell outta mom till she cries or locks herself in the bathroom so no one would see. it's not like anyone would care to be honest. I could cry for hours and no one would even flinch. When did I become invisible, and so small that it doesn't matter if I am even around? I am ignored when I am trying to be a mother, I am ignored when I try to let people know ho...

Let's talk showers

Let's talk showers No, not the kind that falls from the sky when it rains. No, not meteors, but regular showers people take to keep clean. A regular person is in the shower up to 5-10 mins maybe 15 at the most. Well for someone with Lupus, MS and Fibromyalgia it's so much longer. For instance, it took me almost an hour to shower the other day. Why is this you ask? Well, I can barely stand on my own, and do things like lift my hands to shampoo my hair without being so exhausted I have to sit down. So it begins, the clock ticking away. *10 mins gone * sitting down. Once I finally can I stand back up and commence the ritual of the shower but wait, after *10 more mins* I need to take a breath before I pass out (literally) it takes sitting down and breathing slowly to make it not feel like my heart is going to leap out of my chest. I look at my handy dandy Fossil smartwatch and it says my BPM is 140 which I believe. I try to slow down my breathing, a...

ESSENCE MAKEUP REVIEW

Makeup can be high end and really expensive or drugstore and very budget friendly. Just because a drugstore brand is budget friendly doesn't mean it is bad quality. Right? Recently while perusing my local Ulta store with Jayedyn (on the hunt for a blue eye liner ) after looking at all the different brands from Urban Decay, Ulta , Nyx etc. and coming up empty and disappointed we were ready to walk away when i suggested one more look . Tucked away on an end cap of the isle was a small product line. I had never even looked at this brand before but sitting on the shelf was the perfect blue shade of eyeliner that Jayedyn was searching for & on a 15 yr old girls budget too. I started to take a closer look at some of the products . The nail polish is what drew me in, the colors were so pretty, it also looked like there were a few dupes for some high end products as well. I ended ...

My Not So Normal Life and A Few Other Things.

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